How do you FEEL about food? Why do you eat? A: Food is the focus of our existence. I eat to focus.
What is your biggest flaw? A: I always want to do the right thing.
3 favorite authors A: John Updike, Joyce Carol Oates, Iris Murdoch.
What are the hallmarks of success in life? A: Life can be successful?
What is your biggest mental fuck-up? A: Dropping out and getting married.
What is your favorite animal? A: Dolphin. Describe it.
A: Kinda like a fish.
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her? A: It is impolite to wait less than an hour. Jump her? A: See above. Dump her?
A: I don't dump; I *get* dumped.
How old were you when you first kissed? A: 11 Had sex
A: Including masturbation? 5 Smoked Pot? A: Never.
Do you use recreational drugs? A: Yes
What?
A: Alcohol.
When?
A: Always.
Still?
A: Yes
Have you ever been married/lived with someone? A: Married
Who worked?
A: Both, lately. Who cooked?
A: I did, mostly. Who cleaned?
A: I did, always.
Do you know how to cook? A: Yes
Do you like to cook? A: Yes
What are the things you cook best? A: What would you like?
Have you ever used any of the following (which?): gel hairspray mousse cologne deodorant conditioner zitcream aftershave A: Deodorant and conditioner.
What was the most crazy thing you ever did as an adolescent? A: Dressed up in my mother's clothes and pretended to be a stripper. as a college student? A: Drove into Central Los Angeles at 11 pm in a brand-new Chrysler 5th Avenue with another white guy and a 45-caliber on the dashboard, in order to help a welfare mother forge her deadbeat ex-husband's name on a life insurance policy. as a working stiff? A: I always come in early.
If you were a fruit or a vegetable, what would you be? A: I would not be a fruit or a vegetable. If I were, what would I be? A: Mexican mushroom?
If you were at a party, and across the room you saw a very handsome man and your girlfriend chatting quite animatedly, what would you do? A: This happens to me all the time. * sigh *
Do you think there is life after death? A: No
On other planets?
A: Yes
Are you psychic?
A: Yes
Do you think you have any sort of understanding of what it would be like to completely insane? A: Yes
Why?
A: Have worked with schizophrenics and cult members.
Were you ever in the armed forces? A: Yes
Did you ever kiss a girl who had big, hairsprayed bangs? A: No
What was the most important scientific achievement in the last 50 years? A: The silicon chip. (Of all time: quantum mechanics.)
What is the biggest problem...
...all women have? A: Thinking that all men have to be The Man of Their Dreams.
...all men have? A: Men have problems?
...with our society? A: That men think they have no problems.
Which do you prefer: A: Plants
Why?
A: It is hard to sit in the shade of a Chihuahua.
If you won $1 million, what would be the very first thing you would buy? A: A divorce.
The second?
A: Another wife.
The last?
A: Who needs anything else?
Who has been the greatest influence in your life? A: I have no idols.
How do people describe you? A: Reserved, analytical.
How do you describe yourself? A: Intense, cynical.
Do you subscribe to any magazines/newspapers? A: Yes